Praying

The night before I left to Cali I was praying for my boys and for my trip. I was nervous about leaving them, since I've only ever been away for two days. I let my mind wander to those worst case senerio thoughts... What would they do without me? What if something happened to one of them while I was gone? Then I started feeling convicted- for a couple of reasons. First of all, I was worrying instead of trusting that God has everything perfectly laid out in His master plan, and our days and trials are safely in his hands. Second, I felt that I wasn't praying in a mature way. Here's why- I was mostly praying for things like safety, health, and ease. I'm not saying its necessarily wrong to pray for those things; but for me, at that moment, I felt it wasn't right.

I think that too often my prayer life involves me praying for myself or others along the lines of... please help them, may this trial end, make it go away, let it be okay, keep them safe, keep them healthy, may it be easy, fix it, heal it, stop it. I'm still sorting through these ideas and need to search the scripture to find examples of this kind of prayer being okay or not okay. The first two verses that come to mind are:

"Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need." -Heb. 4:16
and
"Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord." -James 5:14

So I think its okay to ask for help and healing. But then I think that maybe a more mature prayer would be asking for strength and guidance to walk in whatever He has for me. "Lord, please lead me today in the things you have for me. May I glorify You in everything I do. Point out anything in me that offends Your Name."

The most famous scripture on prayer is in Matthew, when Jesus is teaching His disciples how to pray.

"In this manner, therefore, pray:
Our Father in heaven,
Hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come.
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
As we forgive our debtors.
And do not lead us into temptation,
But deliver us from the evil one.
For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen." -Mt 6:9-13

I don't at all see Jesus teaching the disciples to pray 'make the pain stop' or 'the suffering to end'. Instead, He instructs them to honor His name when we pray. (I DEFINITELY don't do that enough!) Also, for His will to be done, strength for the day, forgiveness of our sins, and for us to forgive others. In His model we are to be asking for help before we've even sinned- lead us not into temptation. And here's a whopper- break any bondage or hold that the enemy may be gripping us or entangling us with. And then, lastly- its all about You, Jesus. His kingdom, His power, His glory. Eeek! I get so consumed with me and my world.

As I'm typing this out, I'm thinking its okay to come to him like a child would come to his father and ask for help and to ask to 'make it go away'. But I want to start remembering this model when I pray and make it more about Him. Its interesting, too, that all of the disciples who were living hard after him encountered suffering, AND they were all martyrs. We will endure hardship. Scripture tells us this. Why am I so bent out of shape and surprised when it happens? Hardship brings us closer to the Lord. It grows us up in Him.

"Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you; but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ’s sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy. If you are reproached for the name of Christ, blessed are you, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. On their part He is blasphemed, but on your part He is glorified. But let none of you suffer as a murderer, a thief, an evildoer, or as a busybody in other people’s matters. Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in this matter." -1 Peter 4:12-16

Lastly, I just want to share this excerpt I found on the line, "Your kingdom come. Your will be done."

"Jesus taught many things about the kingdom of God, but one seems especially appropriate in this context--that the kingdom of God is within us [Luke 17:20-21]. If we are children of God, who can call Him "Our Father," we have the kingdom of God within us, for Jesus has sent His Spirit to live in us. He promised that as He is in the Father, we will be in Him and He will be in us [John 14:16-20]. Jesus taught that He is the true Vine, and we are those who are to abide in Him as branches that draw their very life from the vine.

Jesus’s life in us puts the kingdom of God within us. For His kingdom to come in us, day after day, we must be filled with the Spirit [Ephesians 5:18]--and this happens only to the degree that we are surrendered to Him, emptied of self. As part of our daily prayer, we must surrender all that we are."